10,000 feet and climbing....

Already in the clouds, gray and white and streaks of rain on the window. Saying my goodbyes to my heart and yet feeling warm and good about going home to my husband, kitties, dog, parakeet, daughter, sons, daughter-in-law, grandbaby (in the womb), house & garden, easels & paints, and so many more riches and blessings waiting for me in my beautiful Tennessee home. Every time I visit the Northwest I revisit that squeezing, crushing sorrow of our move away from Puget Sound, family, friends and I am amazed at how I can still feel that way and be so incredibly happy with my life. It's like the breaking of my heart has made it so much bigger and more open. I can't even begin to name the amazing experiences we have had, the friendships, the music (not all country!), the travels, the ministries, and the creative expressions since we moved away. 


I have no idea what is going through the minds of my fellow travelers on this American Airlines jet. Most are reading, a few are talking (extroverts!), some appear to be sleeping (5 minutes into flight...maybe they are white-knuckle praying:)) None that I can see are holding back the brimming tears like I am. Deep breathing helps. Inhale...2,3,4,...hold...2,3,4...exhale...2,3,4; saying to myself, "put on your big girl panties!", praying my favorite Ann Lamott prayer: help, help, help: and again, Jesus blesses: our jet breaks through the thick clouds just in time to be gobsmacked with a breathtaking close-up view of the top of Mt Rainier with rays of sun shining on the snowy glaciers, then, a moment later, we enter the next layer of clouds, a soft and misty disappearing act. Three seconds of staggering beauty.